“Oh, the weather outside is frightful.
But beating Santa’s ass, is sooooooo delightful.”
Okay, I was paraphrasing those song lyrics. But they tie into today’s topic, you’ll see.
Santa Claus has a long history of showing up in comics books as an actual character, especially around the holidays. In the ’50s and ’60s, it was a more innocent time. Santa showed up as the typical jolly, old elf. He would distribute cheer and famous super heroes would help him deliver his toys to all the boys and girls. Last week, I looked at a few of these jolly comic covers featuring Santa Claus.
In the ’70s and ’80s, things were a bit different for Mr Claus. For one thing, comic heroes had no problem beating the fat boy down. Seriously. Santa showed up as an adversary throughout the ’70s and ’80s. Then in the ’90s and ’00s, Santa turned the tables, armed himself to the teeth, and took on all comers like some bad ass pit fighter in a Van Damme movie.
Today, I’m going to take a look at the comic book covers that feature Santa getting his jolly, old ass handed to him by some of our most beloved superheroes. Don’t worry, though, next week, we’ll see Santa get his revenge. For now, let’s watch all kinds of mayhem be delivered unto “The Claus” as Santa gets his butt kicked by some of the most violent heroes of the ’90s.
Lobo Paramilitary Xmas Special (1991) – I mentioned this comic last year when talking about my holiday reading. Lobo gets into literally a 10 page vicious, bloody brawl against an armed-to-the-teeth Santa. As you can see by the cover, it doesn’t end well for Father Christmas. To be fair, though, Santa is portrayed as a slave driving, drunken dictator over all of his elves.
Hitman #22 (1998) – I’m not sure what leads to this moment in the story, but Santa seems to be in a situation that is causing him to rethink the decisions he’s made. And by that I mean he just crapped his pants. Feliz Navidad, bitch!