Cavalcade of Awesome

If you missed the first part of this article, in which I show you Santa getting his ass kicked, then check it out here.  I also wrote another article featuring ’50s and ’60s super heroes helping Santa deliver toys on their covers.  See those comics here.

This week, we are changing it up and featuring a Santa Claus that has had enough and taking things into his own hands. Time to bloody up the snow with comic book covers featuring Santa kicking all kinds of asses.

From the 2008 Jingle Belle Holiday Special. Santa vs Frankenstein. You saw this a few months ago during my AWESOME-tober-fest 2009 countdown. I still maintain that it is awesome beyond words.  SANTA VERSUS FRANKENSTEIN.  Why has no one else thought of this?  And where’s the movie script?

Hulk #378 – Santa fights The Incredible Hulk.  With a crowbar.  While falling out of a building.  The only thing left would be to have them (or the building) on fire, but I’m not sure my mind could handle that much BAD ASS.

Iron Man #254 – Santa bows up against Iron Man.  Santa gets in a nice shot on Iron Man, but what the hell type of gun is that?  It looks like it’s shooting light beams.  Santa, are you trying to fight Iron Man with a flashlight?!

Spectacular Spider-Man #112 – Remember the cover of Hitman #22?  The one with a pistol in Santa’s mouth?  Well, this is the evil, twin brother to that cover.  This time, instead of coal, Santa is delivering lead to all the naughty boys and girls.  You want a piece of, Kringle?  Come get some.

Santa the Barbarian – Santa gets pissed that the naughty list is much larger than the nice list so he grabs an axe and starts teaching kids what it means to actually be “naughty”. And he does it with beheadings.  “Ho Ho Ho, you naughty sonova Bs!”

The Last Christmas – After the zombie apocalypse, Santa is the only one left to avenge the deaths of his elves and the rest of humanity.  This awesome cover has Santa, packing dual pistols, diving and firing into a crowd of undead zombies.  God bless us, every one.

Manga Claus: The Blade of Kringle (2006) – One of Santa’s elves gets pissed off at Santa and uses magic to bring to life a bunch of ninja teddy bears.  The ninja teddy bears terrorize the workshop until Santa tears off his shirt like Willy the gardener on The Simpsons and whips out his twin katana to bring Christmas vengeance upon the plush little ninjas.  Check out that cover.  Santa is ripped like a pair of ’80s acid wash jeans.  And I love the subtitle, The Blade of Kringle.  Ba-dass.

Hope you’ve enjoyed these ass kickin’ comic covers.  Check back next week for more Christmas goodness.

Share this post:

This entry was posted on December 17, 2009 at 8:00 am and is filed under Christmas, comic books, holiday, pop culture, Santa Claus with tags Christmas, comic books, holiday, pop culture, Santa Claus. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.