Archive for April, 2013

Nerd Lunch Episode 83: Creating movie themed restaurant menus

Posted in fast food, movies, podcast, pop culture with tags , , , , on April 30, 2013 by Paxton

Nerd Lunch Podcast

For this, our 83rd episode, we are joined again by Steve from the Food Junk blog to discuss movies and fast food menus.


Yes, with the release earlier this year of Denny’s Hobbit Menu, we were inspired to take matters into our own hands and imagine what would happen if other restaurants took the same marketing approach and created specialized menus for movies. Imagine Red Lobster creating a menu for a serial killer. What would a Buckaroo Banzai menu look like at a place known mostly for desserts? And would you eat at Olive Garden regardless of the movie it created a menu for?

All these things and more are answered in this week’s Nerd Lunch Podcast.

Download this episode from iTunes or listen to it on Feedburner.

Or listen to it online here.

Btw, I just realized that this is my 700th post.


I “man-down” and review Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 1

Posted in monsters, movies, pop culture, Twilight, vampires with tags , , , , on April 29, 2013 by Paxton

Twilight 4 Part 1

Here we are again, Twilight. Once more we stare at each other across the squared circle in anticipation of this little dance that we’ve done three different times already.  You show up all sparkly and melodramatic and I punch holes into your face until I’m wheezing and wishing I was watching porn.

Let’s begin this dance with a synopisis…

So the movie starts with Bella and Edward’s wedding. It’s in the woods. People show up in florescent tuxes and ascots. It’s all very ethereal and annoying. Not surprisingly Jacob isn’t in attendance until during the reception. He comes with an understandable chip on his shoulder. Edward is now actually trying to be nice and reason with him. For once, I actually feel like Edward cares for Bella.  He tells Jacob that he needs him to help protect Bella. Jacob discovers that Bella hasn’t been turned yet and then he keeps focusing on the eventual “love making” that Edward is going to impart on Bella’s still human vagina and how it could kill her. It’s a rather awkward situation and Jacob just keeps going on and on about it.

After Jacob runs off very dramatically with his pack, Bella and Edward retreat to the Cullen’s private Brazilian island (of COURSE they have an island) to spend what feels like 6 months on their honeymoon. And then Bella and Edward “do the deed” and she and the bed come out looking like the scene of a street fight. Edward vows never to lay with his wife again, until he does about 10 minutes later. Bella turns up preggers with a mutant child that grows months in a matter of weeks.

The wolfpack discovers the pregnancy and plan to attack and kill the “abomination” (I agree).  Jacob violently leaves the pack to protect Bella.  Bella becomes weak and pallid as the baby is drawing off her life force (much like this movie is doing to me).  She painfully gives birth to the child and, in spite, gives it the terrible name Renneesme (I don’t care that it’s a combo of their mothers’ names…it’s still terrible).  Edward injects his “poison” into Bella’s heart after birth to turn her into a vampire but the process doesn’t seem to take and Bella seemingly dies as the Cullens and wolfpack battle.  Jacob goes to kill the child himself now that Bella is “dead” but finds he’s creepily “imprinted” on the horribly named child.  Since Jacob now wants to have intercourse with the baby, by the werewolf rule, she can not be harmed.

Bella and Edward
“Oh look, Jacob wants to have sex with our newborn child. How sweet.”

Bella is cleaned and dressed for her “funeral”, I guess, but suddenly her wounds heal and she awakens as a newborn vampire.  And I suddenly realize that I have nothing left to give this terrible, terrible franchise.  I’m struggling to find the testicular fortitude to finish the one last movie in this saga.  The rest of the movies were bad, this one just was….meh.  It wasn’t just f**king awful, especially compared to the second and third movies, but it’s not good, either.  I was surprised that I liked Edward a little bit more in this one.  He actually seemed less wooden and melodramatic and more protective of Bella.  Jacob was even more of an irritating hot head than usual.  And I used to like him once upon a time.  We get some pretty good vamp vs werewolf action, but the wolfpack people suck.  You know, I try to find one thing I like and two others that I hate spring up and take its place.  Like the movie is actively trying to get me to hate it.

I think I’ve said this before, but I’m going to watch the last and final (praise Jesus) movie out of sheer dogged stubbornness.  But I won’t enjoy it.  Like  experiencing a prison rape at Riker’s Island, I’ve just got to bite down and get through it.

Cult Film Club Episode 6: Zapped! (1982)

Posted in movies, podcast, pop culture with tags , , on April 24, 2013 by Paxton

Cult Film Club

Welcome to episode 6 of the Cult Film Club.  This week Shawn, Jaime and I watch and discuss the teen sex comedy Zapped! starring the future Charles in Charge leads, Scott Baio and Willie Aames. The movie also features the lovely Heather Thomas, Felice Schachter and a slew of other familiar 80s faces like Scatman Crothers, Eddie Deezen and the worst looking Mr Spock you’ve ever seen.

Zapped! half sheet

We talk about our history with the movie. We talk about the movie’s origins. We talk about the nature of homage and parody. We also discuss telekinetic rape. Because, well, we haven’t done that in a show yet.

Download the latest episode from iTunes or listen to it online right here.

Nerd Lunch Episode 82: 90s sitcoms

Posted in podcast, pop culture, TV shows with tags , , , , on April 23, 2013 by Paxton

Nerd Lunch Podcast

You have arrived at Episode 82 of the Nerd Lunch podcast. Unfortunately, Jeeg went on a bender the other night and is sleeping it off so we are joined by two guests. The first is my co-host from the Cult Film Club podcast, Jaime Hood. Also in the guest seat is the return of our good friend, William Bruce West.


This week the four of us discuss sitcoms from the 1990s.  We talk about our favorites, our not so favorites, some of the ones we thought were overrated and some of the ones we thought were canceled too soon.  Surprisingly there are a couple shows that show up on all of those lists.  It’s a fun time talking about TV shows from the 90s, so join us, won’t you?

Download this episode from iTunes or listen to it on Feedburner.

Or listen to it online here.

LL Cool J’s senses destroying debut in the movie Krush Groove

Posted in movies, music, rap with tags , , , on April 19, 2013 by Paxton


This week, The League is asking us —

“What moment in pop culture had you saying “Now, that’s how you make an introduction!”

One thing popped into my mind as the perfect example of a bombasic and awesome introduction.  This week I’ve been writing an article ranking Run-DMC’s studio albums in order of my personal preference as well as researching the group Run-DMC in preparation for the 25th anniversary of their album Tougher than Leather.  So that is why this particular movie introduction was on my mind.  I’ve talked about it several times on my blog. It happens during one of my favorite movies of all time, Krush Groove.

Krush Groove

Around the middle of the movie, Run-DMC and uber producer Rick Rubin are holding auditions. A young lady finishes singing a song and as they are escorting her out and are closing the auditions, a group of three guys storm in. The one in the middle is LL Cool J. Amongst the protests of Jam Master Jay and Rubin that the auditions are closed, and without preamble, LL yells “BOX!” at his friend who proceeds to hit PLAY on the suitcase nuke-sized portable stereo in his hand. The beat starts, LL paces the floor like a caged tiger for a few seconds and then proceeds to TEAR THE ROOF OFF THE STUDIO with the opening verse to I Can’t Live Without My Radio.

It’s hard now to really put this scene into the proper context of 1985. I saw this movie in the theater and the scene blew my young mind. LL’s delivery and aggressive lyrics mixed with the minimal bass-filled beats were like a jackhammer tearing away at my preconceived notions about rap. This scene made me an LL fan for life. And while LL has certainly mellowed over the years, he still has it in him to create an energy filled rap track.

Check out his most recent single, WHADDUP, with Chuck D, Tom Morello and Travis Barker.

Other top introductions from around The League:
Pop Rewind talks about being introduced to movie franchises like Batman and Terminator via their sequels
Brian at Cool and Collected talks about great 80s rock intros
Diary of a Dorkette talks about being introduced to She-Ra
Goodwill Geek talks about his introduction to Thundercats
Both Batcave Toy Room and Las Vegas Yankee talk about Superman: The Movie.