It’s Christmas time! I love Christmas time. The decorations, the holiday-only items in the stores and toys. Can’t have Christmas without kick-ass toys. However, I especially love flipping through the TV channels during the holiday season. All of the TV logos are juiced up for the holidays and our old Christmas Special favorites are dusted off and traipsed out in front of us like a former beauty queen, well past her prime. There are plenty to catch. Endless remakes of A Christmas Carol, TV shows centering their activities around Christmas parties, beloved cartoon characters meeting Santa Claus and learning that “to give is better than to receive”. You’ve seen them, you know them. But the undisputed king of television holiday specials has got to be the studios of Rankin-Bass. Rankin-Bass consistently made the most treasured and beloved holiday specials of all time. Their track record is undeniable. Their influence on the holiday is unmistakable. Let’s take a look back at the animation studios of Rankin-Bass and some of their most famous specials; most you’ve no doubt seen dozens of times, but many you probably didn’t realize they created.
Rankin-Bass was established in the early ’60s by Arthur Rankin Jr and Jules Bass. Originally named Videocraft International, they independently produced several animation series including Pinocchio in 1960 and Tales of the Wizard of Oz in 1961. Pinocchio was animated in the “ani-magic” style of animation using puppets and stop motion photography (which would later become a Rankin-Bass trademark), while Tales of the Wizard of Oz was animated in traditional 2-D animation. The Oz series would be popular enough to adapt into a TV movie in 1964. This TV movie would air on the popular GE Fantasy Hour. Then, in December of 1964, the GE Fantasy Hour would air the first Rankin-Bass Christmas special, Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, which would go on to become one of the most popular and longest running specials in TV history.
Santa Claus (1960) – This is, hands-down, one of the wackiest, most insane movies ever put to film. Don’t let the cute, twinkle eyed Santa on the poster fool you. In this movie Santa lives in a castle that sits on the clouds (!) with Merlin. Yes, THAT Merlin. He uses a giant telescope to spy on the children of Earth. He also has hundreds of kids stashed away in this castle building him toys. It’s like a Nike sweatshop in the clouds. The kids are all from different countries, and their workstations are labeled as such with signs saying “America”, “Jamaica”, “China”, etc (so, actually, it’s more like United Colors of Benetton in a Nike sweatshop). It’s surreal. And the main conflict of this movie? Santa vs the Devil. Yes, THAT Devil. All for the soul of a poor little girl named Lupita. I haven’t even begun to scratch the surface of this maniacal map of insanity. You can actually buy this DVD 
Holiday fruitcake. Yes, it’s that time once again for supermarkets to foist this holiday abomination on an American public that never really wants it in the first place. Seriously, who eats this crap? As far as I know, it’s only given away as gifts to other people. Then re-gifted again to more people. If no one wants it or eats it, why are people apparently buying it? Stores keep selling it, so people must be buying it, right?. And why is it called fruitcake? It’s not cake. It’s not fruit. It’s like eating silly putty mixed with colored pieces of plastic. Who is buying this stuff to warrant stores putting it out every year? It’s like the Bermuda Triangle or Sasquatch. We may never know the real answer.
This isn’t a Christmas item per se, and I may be behind the times, but I found these for the first time this week. Grapples. I know you want to say Grapple with a short a, but it’s pronounced Grape-L, with a long a, as in Grapes. The idea is that it’s an apple that tastes like a grape. Interesting idea, but my thoughts are that if I wanted grapes, I would have bought grapes. I can’t remember ever thinking, “Man, I really want grapes, but they are way too small to eat, dude. I want one giant grape the size of an apple.” I’ve never said that, even when I was high. Oh, and they are EXPENSIVE. Seriously. So, don’t waste your money. They don’t taste like grapes. Oh, they’ll try to lure you in with a siren song of grape smelling goodness, but it’s an empty promise that leads to nothing but disappointment and despair as they taste like apples. You’re essentially eating an apple bathed in grape flavored deodorant. But I’m not bitter about it or anything.
Hey, it’s the holidays, it’s time for soda companies to start mixing cranberries into all of their sodas to give them that Santa-red color that leaves you feeling tingly and safe inside like an old blanket. Sierra Mist Cranberry Splash shows up again this year after debuting at Christmas time last year. And he’s brought his brother, Sierra Mist Free. I don’t believe Sierra Mist Free recevied the Cranberry baptism last year, but I’m glad I found it this year. It’s REALLY good. I wish this was available all year. I still have half of a 12 pack of regular Sierra Mist Cranberry from last year. I’ve been savoring it in case they didn’t bring it back this year. Canada Dry also released their Cranberry Ginger Ale again. This can be found year-round in some places, but only in limited quantities. This is another good soda that really tastes good as a mixer. Seriously, try mixing in some Vodka or Hanger 1 Mandarin Blossom with these, especially the Sierra Mist. It will make your bells jingle and your Kris……kringle (haha, that was awesome).
OMG, I found out about this a week or two ago. I have been trying to find it ever since. Pomegranate infused 7-Up. How heavenly does that sound? And look how Christmas-y the logo is! Oh man, I’ll be stalking my local supermarkets waiting for this to show up. Me want Pomegranate 7-Up.
Candy Cane Pop Rocks, my friends. Not bad, not great, but not bad. it’s really just crunched up candy cane dust with some of the trademark pop rock crackle. I was slightly disappointed. Maybe I’ll save a pouch of this and dump it in a warm can of 7-Up Pomegranate and chug it. Then we’ll have a party……
Yes, it’s that time of year for companies to whore out the license for the old-school stop motion puppet movie, Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. Check out the elf that wanted to be a dentist, Yukon Cornelius, and the giant snow monster. You see these every year, kinda makes me sad how my childhood memories are bought and sold to the sweaty masses for peanuts. PEANUTS, PEOPLE!!!!
Cavalcade of Awesome 