I’m a reader. I love to read. And I sometimes enjoy reading classic literature. However, some of the old stuff is just flat out boring as balls. I mean, have you actually read Thomas Hardy’s Tess of the D’Urbervilles, Frank Norris’ McTeague
or anything by James Joyce
? Snoozeville. Population…YOU. I had to read those in high school and I needed to drink a case of Jolt Cola
to get through just one chapter.
So, being the helpful guy that I am, I thought I’d take some boring classics you may have had to read in high school and college and make them better. More AWESOME. And easier to read.
So now, here are seven ways to make classic literature a lot more AWESOME. You are welcome, literature.
Don Corleone Quixote – Old guard crime boss Don Corleone Quixote sets up shop in an old windmill with trusty right hand man Pancha.
Little Haunted House on the Prairie – A family is brutally murdered in their secluded old farm house. Twenty years later, an unsuspecting couple purchases the old farm house looking for a serene retreat from their hectic lives only to find skin crawling terror and wheelbarrows of blood.
The Grapes of Wrath of Khan – The Joad family pick up a hitchhiker on their way to California. Little do they know their new addition is a genetically enhanced super being from the future looking to overthrow and rule the human race. Wackiness ensues.