Archive for the donate blood Category

Bloodsport: My adventures donating the red stuff

Posted in donate blood, humor, life, personal, Uncategorized with tags , , on July 30, 2008 by Paxton

Wait, I missed posting to my blog last week? WTF?! Wow, that one flew right passed me. Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit taking fistfuls of Xanax. Yikes, the things that happen when you stay sober. Life lessons, people. Lessons that you learn in life. That’s what this is. How did I lose a week?!  Maybe I was abducted by aliens.  Yeah, that’s it, aliens were not-surprisingly attracted to my ridiculous awesomeness and had to perform their “experiments” on me to determine the origin of my awesome (maybe my wife and I should stop marathon-ing X-Files episodes, it may be affecting my thought process).

Actually, I fully intended to post an article last week but several things stopped me, and by “several things” I mean “one thing”. That one thing is that I’m really f’n lazy.

Laziness

It’s time I call a spade a spade and just lay it out on the table. I’m a lazy S.O.B. If the TV remote is lost in the cushions of the sofa, I won’t look for it. I’m watching whatever is on TV, even if that happens to be a marathon of makeover shows on TLC. 10 Years Younger, What Not to Wear, You Look Like An Idiot…whatever. I’m watching it. I once watched a marathon of home decorating shows on HGTV because the batteries in the remote were dead. It’s insane. Speaking of, how many houses have nice maple wood floors underneath orange shag carpeting? If you watch these shows, pretty much every home in America. I also learned that if you live in the Northeast, your home is as old as the US Constitution, has at most 1000 square feet and can be sold on the open market for about $400,000 – $500,000.  That’s just how the Northerners roll.  But I digress.

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