The Grocery Aisle of long forgotten breakfast cereals Pt II

Allrighty, here’s Part II of the discontinued cereals article.  If you missed Part I, click here, my friends, otherwise, let’s walk back down Aisle 7c (Nostalgia) and take a look at some more forgotten cereals from our childhood.

Burgen, flurgen, murgen…BORK BORK BORK!! The cereal with the nonsense name. Swedish Chef was one of the more popular Muppets, so it’s not surprising he got his own cereal. This was released in the late ’80s and the commercials for it were produced by Jim Henson, right before he died. Here is one of the commercials.

Croonchy Stars

What if you want a breakfast food that looks like other food? I mean, why eat donuts for breakfast when you can have cereal…shaped like donuts? Or waffles? Or ice cream? These cereals remind me of that Jim Belushi skit on SNL where he’s an Olympic athlete that eats “Little Chocolate Donuts” for breakfast. See that skit here. Here are cereals based on donuts, including a Dunkin Donuts branded cereal. I actually remember each of these.

DonutzDinky DonutsDunkin Donuts

Waffles and Ice Cream; two tastes that taste great together. I actually created a Kool-Aid flavor based on Ice Cream Cones cereal. Check it out here. Below are the boxes for Maple and Blueberry Waffelos and Chocolate and Vanilla Ice Cream Cones cereals.  I remember Waffelos, but I don’t think I ever tried it.  I did, however, used to eat Ice Cream Cones.

WaffleosBlueberry WaffleosIce Cream Cones cerealIce Cream Cones cereal

Cereals based on movies are a hit or miss endeavor. Take a look at this collection, easily two of these cereals rock. The others are based on ET and Gremlins. I wonder if we’ll see a Watchmen cereal? Here’s the commercial for ET Cereal. And here’s Gremlins. The C-3POs commercial is appropriately awesome because it’s based on the original trilogy. The Star Wars Episode II cereal blew, like most of the prequel trilogy. I believe they also made an Episode III, as well as several other forgettable Star Wars cereal variations, but none were as good as the original, C-3POs. Unlike the lame Star Wars knockoff cereals, this kick ass Batman cereal commercial rocks and uses images and music from the 1989 movie.  Gremlins cereal?  Really?

C3POsStar WarsETBatmanGremlins

Anyone remember this cereal? The cereal itself wasn’t very spectacular, it was the commercial that everyone remembers. The answer to every question is “Nut & Honey”. Here’s that memorable commercial.

Nut & Honey Crunch

Sugar Smacks has a very famous mascot in Dig’ Em the frog. But before Kellogg’s used Dig ‘Em, they used pics of creepy ass clowns. Try not to gaze into their dead, inhuman eyes or you’ll start to feel your soul slowly slipping away. You can almost hear the clowns whisper, “Join me, little one. Join meeeeeeeeeee!”  No worries, though, in exchange for your immortal soul you’ll get model speedboats and submarines!  **shudder**

Sugar Smacks ClownSugar Smacks clown 2

WTF is up with zombie clowns and kid’s cereals? I would’ve bricked my Underoos if I saw these boxes on the breakfast table.
Sugar Rice KrinklesSugar Rice Krinkles

Man, these things look ridonkulously sweet. I love Corn Pops, but this might be a bit too sweet. This box totally looks like late ’80s early ’90s, right? Wrong, made in 2001.  Another flavor extension for an existing cereal:  Candy Corn Pops.
Candy Corn Pops

Here are some weird ass cereal boxes that fit into no category except “completely insane”.  Grins & Smiles & Giggles & Laughs…WTF?!  And the box looks like something from the ’70s.  The next one is Magic Puffs.  Yes, you heard me correctly…MAGIC.  PUFFS.  And there’s a smiling disembodied hat flying across the box.  Could they put any more overt a marijuana reference on this box?  Maybe call the cereal “Pass the Dutchie” and have a giant smoking joint on the front?  How about Crazy Cow?  Eat any mad cow burgers lately?  Then we have Baron von Redberry and his arch nemesis Sir Grapefellow.  Other than the fact that their names kick all kinds of ass, they are based on World War I flying aces, which have no connection to cereal at all.  Very cool idea, though, as these guys were marketed as nemeses.  What can I say about Klondike Pete’s Crunchy Nuggets that can’t be gleaned by looking at the box images and the name of the cereal?  It might be the greatest name in the history of boxed cereal.  Why this is no longer made will remain a mystery to me.
Giggles & SmilesMagic PuffsCrazy CowBaron von RedberrySir GrapefellowKlondike Pete's

I think that’s it for today, kiddies. Hope you enjoyed this little trip down Aisle 7c. We may be visiting it again, so stay tuned.

FYI…I’m going to be gone next week. I surprised the wife with a romantic vacation trip I planned for us to take. It’s her spring break next week, so I took the time off and we are going away for several days to just “get away” from it all. I may put up a few short articles, or I may not. Entirely up to what goes down. We’ll see.

Have a great weekend and an even better next week. I know I will.

UPDATE! – See Part III of this article here!

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42 Responses to “The Grocery Aisle of long forgotten breakfast cereals Pt II”

  1. I never did get to try any of these so I believe they should bring some of them back… preferably Ice Cream Cones!

    Have a great vacation!

  2. The clown on the bottom right looks like he’s trying to eat me!

  3. Your former freakin' neighbor Says:

    My mom would never buy the sugared cereals for us. It was all Total, Cheerios and cornflakes. Truly the best was the cookie crisp when they first came out because it was, seriously, justa box of small cookies.Not puffed and shaped like cookie. Just cookies. Brilliant!

    “And that’s why Little Chocolate Donuts have been on my training table since I was a kid.” (Taps an ash off his cigarette)

  4. f’n Phenomenal post…I haven’t thought about these cereals since I was a kid! Excellent post.

  5. you and your breakfast cereals…lol. how cute is the ET cereal.
    those clowns are seriously demented looking.

  6. Thanks, Armpit! I enjoyed writing it.

    bookworm — I know, right! Those clowns are f’n scary!!

  7. The cereal I miss is Jets by General Mills. I suspect that the cereal wasn’t very good and sugar frosted Cherrios is a close approximation. But the special offer shown on the back of some packages was for books about space. These books were my first way of learning about space, rockets and astronomy. Also, there’s a picture of myself and my siblings each holding a box of Jets on Christmas Day. I forget why but it obviously meant a lot to us back then.

    • Paul — I had found several images of Jets cereal, and I liked the box art, but wound up not being able to fit it into the article. Maybe in the next one.

  8. I remember the cereal Grins & Smiles & Giggles & Laughs.
    And Klondike Pete’s Gold Rush Cereal was my favorite coming up!

  9. Klondike Pete was the best cereal ever – the day it was discontinued was a bleak day indeed

    • Man, I’m like the only one to miss out on the Halley’s Comet of cereals. How did I miss Klondike Pete and how can I go on living knowing I missed it? It’s a pain I’ll wrestle with every day of my life. EVERY. DAY.

  10. One of my favorite cereals no longer made was Circus Fun.

  11. jason savage Says:

    i need to know ok does anyone remember the two cereals that were the mummy and werewolf they got taken away and count chocula and boo berry and frankenberry made it i know one had like multi flavors i think but its driving me crazy its the werewolf cereal and mummy cereal thanks

    • The mummy was Fruity Yummy Mummy. The wolf was Fruit Brute.

      • Wow, I thought I was the only one to remember those. My wife swore up and down there was no such when I brought these up as she bought herself some Count Chocula(her favorite cereal)

  12. Milkman Dan Says:

    I remember liking “Nut & Honey” a lot, even though it wasn’t that great in retrospect. I hadn’t realized it was discontinued. Nowadays I’m more likely to eat Raisin Bran or Special K.

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  14. I know it’s not as old, but I miss Rice Krispie Treats Cereal. It was solid.

  15. I LOVED DONUTZ!!!!!!!

  16. Compare

    and

    Sugar Krinkles cereal box

    Now we know how Captain Spaulding got so screwed up.

  17. My favorite cereal as kid in the 1940s was Kellogg’s Krumbles, apparently discontinued in 1972, although I hadn’t seen it for ten years before that.

    I also remember a new cereal named Cheerioats. There was a trademark dispute and the name was changed to Cheerios.

  18. OMG! I remember that my mother would never buy pre-sweetened cereals…and then, like magic (I think it was a coupon, actually) she bought a box of Freakies cereal. It was glorious!

    It had a magnet as the secret suprise in the box. I gave the magnet to my grandparents the next time I saw them. It was still on their refrigerator when my grandmother died…25 years later!

  19. Freakies had the best toys inside. Pretty average sugar cereal as I recall, but the toys were cool and the commercials were made by druggies or somethin’. Wild.

  20. SugarBomb Says:

    The “hook” for Crazy Cow cereal was that it was coated in “Quik”-like powdered drink mix, so it would turn the milk flavored as it dissolved. yuck!

    Corn Pops is a much less sweet name than the cereal used to bear. Remember it began life as “Sugar Pops” with a cowboy marketing theme, then later became Sugar Corn Pops with a stupid animated porcupine theme, before settling into the modern pantheon as Corn Pops.

    Sugar Crisp went a similar path. Sugar Crisp became Super Sugar Crisp became Super Golden Crisp and then just lost its Super. Sugar Smacks became Honey Smacks, then became Smacks, but then again became Honey Smacks once honey rehabilitated its image. Both of these are extremely sweet cereals, sweeter than Crunchberries, sweeter than Trix, or perhaps as sweet as Lucky Charms would be if it had just the charmsmallows.

  21. I love the cereal covers, Can i get a down load so I can put them in my picture files. I am a graphic artist and would love to have them as a reference. thanks

  22. Christopher Bakkenopoulos Says:

    Hey,

    Anyone out there remember Pink Panther Flakes (like frosted flakes, only pink)? Or is it possible I imagine eating these on a road trip with my dad outside Kansas City in the mid 70’s…

  23. You did not imagine it. It existed.

  24. Remember my brother got a Crazy Cow frisbee for sending boxtops in, he was so pissed when a high school kid stole it from me. Looking back it was pretty non hetero looking considering its pepto pink color.

  25. Oh, and BTW it was John Belushi not his hack unfunny brother.

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  27. Ghostbusters cereal was fricken awesome…

  28. I remember some of these, but the only one I actually remember eating was Ice Cream Cones cereal. Not sure which one, though.

    I do remember a couple of others not on here, namely Dinersaurs (if memory serves) and O.J.’s, which was another orange-flavored cereal which turned the milk orange.

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